Thursday, July 7, 2011

Our sneaky ancestors! Floss 'n F*** and get ahead!

Well, now we know!  It is the secret to our ancestors' evolutionary success.  Floss your teeth if you want to make a baby!  Yes, the truth is out!
Regular visits to the dentist and good oral hygiene habits such as flossing play an important role for women who are trying to become pregnant, according to a new study finding women with gum disease take an average of 2 months longer to conceive.
After monitoring a group of 3,737 pregnant women who were taking part in a Western Australian study called the SMILE study, researcher from the University of Western Australia analyzed the pregnancy planning and outcome information of 3,416 of the women.
The findings showed that women with gum disease took an average of just over 7 months to become pregnant, which was 2 months longer than the average of 5 months it took women without gum disease to conceive.
Now, those clever Ur-mammas are the ones who figured this out (undoubtedly from informal case-control studies done in their local cave complexes).  The found some grape vine or other suitably stringy material, cleaned their teeth, and then called coyly to their Alley Oop!  "C'mere, honey bunch!  I have something to tell you...."

Or, more figuratively so to speak, when Adam slid the edge of that fig leaf between his teeth.....

This explains why, today, there is so much interest in flossing.  We've all got the FlossIt gene, or at least any variation in the gene is due to recent mutations.  Those who (ugh! how gross!) let their interdental spaces collect various food detritus, simply can't find a mate.  But most of us are descendants of Flossy Eve, we hunger to floss because we know what that'll get us!

We bring this to your attention as part of our Public Interest Department, with no commercial sponsorship or other ulterior motive.  We get no money from OralB.

The bottom line is that it's the 18 inch rather than the 6 inch, factor that's most important in human evolution!

1 comment:

Texbrit said...

I think it's only fair to replicate the study on rats before jumping to any conclusions. Floss their little rat-teeth and see if they have more little rat-babies!